Tuesday, January 27

Snarks, snorks and passing flashes of wit.

The word *Snark* is a rather expressive one. Much like "snort", and "snorks", its very execution by the human mouth can be a bit of a joke with the appropriate accent and nasal quality applied (grin). Good snark is snork-worthy! None of these however are as much fun as the SNARF. Timing is everything in producing a good snarf: i.e. telling a joke perfectly timed so that the receiver of the joke laughs when they have a mouthful of milk, water, whatever and said liquid exits through the nasal passages. (OK, it's juvenile, so smack my hand and tell me to go stand in the corner!)

However, SNARK has been somewhat bastardized by a certain brand of very unattractive Internet personalities.

Snark, as I define it, involves an affectionate smidgen of wit that means no true harm to anyone in particular, but is an overall comment concerning social conditions , general public faux paus or an ever-charming self-deprecating humor that keeps you humble. Half the enjoyment of this type of snark is to pronounce it, own it and unashamedly attach your name to it,(accountability, after all, is one of the highest human virtues!) All accompanied by a grin. I am unfortunately in the minority with this definition. I'd like to claim it back, but the prospects are very dim.

Snark, as much of the Internet defines it, is an annonymous, mean-spirited, cowardly form of anti-communication. A diarrhea of written ridicule, there is nothing whatsoever constructive or witty about it. The cheapest and easiest tool of anonomous fools, it pervades the Internet message boards, blogs and yes, legitimate media.

You don't have to be smart or clever. Just mean. And I would tend to question the level of genuine self-esteem lurking in the brain of a serial Internet snarker. They will never comprehend just how instantaneously they are branded as useless. All they want to do is make someone else feel bad so they don't have to dwell on their own shortcomings.

I miss wit. Rapier or otherwise. Wit is the orgasm of speech :) It brings a warm smile to my brain (while I still have one!) It is the "smootch" (yes, the "t" is there on purpose!)of language.

And while the downside of Internet Snark is routinely practiced without any accountability, I have great hope that with a concentrated dose of wit and gracious, civilized humor, Snark can once again become a snork-worthy, affectionate part of our written language.

Saturday, January 24

Passing Grade

Sometimes, if you go through life doing nothing but testing people, by the time someone passes your test, the class has been cancelled.

My Shadow

It isn't in the darkest of night or brilliance of a sunrise
that you most occupy the recesses known as my heart.

It is in the vague void-like shadows between dawn and dusk
that wrap around the average, the mundane, the simple complexities
of breathe in-breath out.

And though often by myself.
I am never alone.


Saturday, January 10

Lip Service

"Lip Service"

The soul kisses in many ways.

Silently, yearningly, in a distance of days

and miles.

But the caress is still there.

If you consort with magic and dreams,

soul kisses connect even when it seems

they fail.

And the caress lingers on.

So give kisses...

even when lips

are not there to receive.


Friday, January 9

Find peace where you are.

"Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn whatever state I am in, therin to be content"
Helen Keller

Sunday, January 4

Winter Time...Great for a Steamy good...


It's a great time of year (for those of us in the wintrier climes) to do a lot of blanket snuggling. And if the local cable channels choose to be showing an overabundance of decidedly non-chick-flick slash-gash-gore and bloody damn war offerings (ignore my not-so-subtle snark-intended)...one might still have a need to reach for a good torso tingling bit of Sophisticated Erotica!

Goddesses much prefer the sensuality of entwining limbs than the brutality of fighting/biting/igniting limbs. (though I guess a good erotic romance might involve some serious igniting, just hopefully it would be in the loins not the limbs!)

Ah well, children, cast your eyes elsewhere and enjoy being kids...contrary to popular belief, you WILL grow up eventually and you WILL miss those carefree days. Adults with a need for a more mind tweaking steamy little adventure...please check out my author's site. I am going the route of independently offering my copyrighted, published e-book novels and short stories for purchased download :)

Come give me a look if that is your inclination...and if you happen to BE an author of said sophisticated steamy romantic style stories, write me about posting a possible link in the comments section! We ALL need a little bit of intelligent, thoughtful, sense prodding yumminess in our adult psyches!

(this is NOT an invitation for tacky crap high school wet dreams macho ditzy bimbo porn soaked humpa humpa brainless story links by the way. As a Goddess of my own world, I reserve the right to ignore any such juvenile links or goofball requests!) It's sooo good being a Goddess (La la la)

Just More of Me

Friday, January 2

The Royal WE

Found this on Twitter from a very witty lady and had a most amusing moment finding out what I already knew...I am Queen LOLOL. Welllll, I still prefer my self-proclaimed Goddessness, but being Queen for a Moment isn't a bad thing...unless...

You had the sad misfortune of being Queen to one foul and putrid Henry VIII, whose only redeeming quality was that he fathered one of the most brilliant, strong and complex women in English history. Elizabeth.

Frankly, I think, as far as fate goes, that was his only real reason for *being* in the first place. He was, as quite a few men in power in those veddy civilized days, a legalized serial killer!

Harsh you say?