Snarks, snorks and passing flashes of wit.

The word *Snark* is a rather expressive one. Much like "snort", and "snorks", its very execution by the human mouth can be a bit of a joke with the appropriate accent and nasal quality applied (grin). Good snark is snork-worthy! None of these however are as much fun as the SNARF. Timing is everything in producing a good snarf: i.e. telling a joke perfectly timed so that the receiver of the joke laughs when they have a mouthful of milk, water, whatever and said liquid exits through the nasal passages. (OK, it's juvenile, so smack my hand and tell me to go stand in the corner!)

However, SNARK has been somewhat bastardized by a certain brand of very unattractive Internet personalities.

Snark, as I define it, involves an affectionate smidgen of wit that means no true harm to anyone in particular, but is an overall comment concerning social conditions , general public faux paus or an ever-charming self-deprecating humor that keeps you humble. Half the enjoyment of this type of snark is to pronounce it, own it and unashamedly attach your name to it,(accountability, after all, is one of the highest human virtues!) All accompanied by a grin. I am unfortunately in the minority with this definition. I'd like to claim it back, but the prospects are very dim.

Snark, as much of the Internet defines it, is an annonymous, mean-spirited, cowardly form of anti-communication. A diarrhea of written ridicule, there is nothing whatsoever constructive or witty about it. The cheapest and easiest tool of anonomous fools, it pervades the Internet message boards, blogs and yes, legitimate media.

You don't have to be smart or clever. Just mean. And I would tend to question the level of genuine self-esteem lurking in the brain of a serial Internet snarker. They will never comprehend just how instantaneously they are branded as useless. All they want to do is make someone else feel bad so they don't have to dwell on their own shortcomings.

I miss wit. Rapier or otherwise. Wit is the orgasm of speech :) It brings a warm smile to my brain (while I still have one!) It is the "smootch" (yes, the "t" is there on purpose!)of language.

And while the downside of Internet Snark is routinely practiced without any accountability, I have great hope that with a concentrated dose of wit and gracious, civilized humor, Snark can once again become a snork-worthy, affectionate part of our written language.